About Love: Reinventing Romance for our Times

I have a tremendous respect for late Robert Solomon. I think he was a terrific scholar, his lectures on Nietzsche and Heidegger on video were great. That is why I bought this book. But I was a little disappointed. First, this book has neither the end-notes or the index. But my main criticism is this: his insistence that Love is not a feeling is puzzling. How could we grasp something if not through thinking or feeling? We certainly don't "think" love. Where is Love in relation to drive, desire and instinct? Also, he means "love" which is universal phenomenon, the same for men and women. He says nothing about the post-Freudian ideas where the feminine love may be different from men's. Lacan, for example, says that a woman can only enter a psychic economy of men as a fantasy object, the cause of their desire. But for women, it is apparently different. I believe that there could be a difference between masculine and feminine love. Solomon's definition of love as an emotional process defined by attitudes, culture, and art seems interesting, but it is unclear how physical love is tied with this. It is not an emotion. And finally, the book completely ignores the feminist theory, which regards Love as a part of male ideology for securing the subordination of women. Whatever love is, it is still a mystery.

I have enjoyed some of Dr. Solomon's work very much, specifically his lectures on existential philosophers. About Love gets a bit convoluted as Solomon weaves together history, philosophy, and psychology on the topic of romantic love. This work does have one glaring contradiction: as he spends almost all of the book emphasizing the unity, devotion, honesty, trust, etc. necessary to sustain romantic love for a lifetime, he also includes a chapter suggesting that sexual activity outside of the relationship can be acceptable and even desirable, as long as the behavior is not deceitful. In his later lectures he acknowledges that this liberal attitude was a distinct mistake, but it is not corrected in the second printing of this book.

This wonderful book is not a psychology book, but it does deal in the way only a philosopher with an endearing, easy to read, and a deepunderstanding of human nature and history could express himself. I heartily recommend this to anyone who is curious about the most importantexperience life has to offer.

If you've every doubted that you deserve love and you deserve to love yourself, this book will give you the necessary insight to overcome any doubts. I gave this book to my daughter who is a Marriage, Family, and Child therapist. She uses it in her practice.

This is a philosopher's reflection on love relationships. Well-written with interesting thoughts. Not for everyone, but if you can enjoy the style, you can learn a lot. He is very thoughtful.

I loved this book when I read it in 1990 or so, no pun intended. When we were talking about marriage, it helped us sort out the cocaine-high of infatuation from longterm love. We are still married and still very much in love, the kind that grows and gets better over time if you let it. I was searching for it recently to gift it and can't understand why it is so hard to find and why it isn't available on Kindle.

great book

Excellent!