Without a Map: A Caregiver’s Journey through the Wilderness of Heart and Mind

“Without a Map” measures up to my sense of what makes a book not just good but superb. In Lisa Steele-Maley’s graceful prose—which is a joy to read—you see a fine mind and a loving heart at work. Her use of her frequent forays into the wilderness as a metaphor for her journey with her beloved father thru the thickets of Alzheimer’s disease gave me more guidance than I received from learning science-based “tips, tricks, and techniques” as I tried to accompany my mother on the same journey. And the take-away lessons to be learned from this real-life story are treasures in themselves. E.g., “Caring for, loving, and grieving for my Dad has heightened my resolve to live a life of intention and meaning”—the final lesson from a father who had already taught his daughter well. I finished the book with a more understanding heart, more courage (at age 80) to face into my own old age, and with a smile on my face: While it's true that there is no map for the perplexing journey with a loved one lost in Alzheimer’s disease, Lisa Steele-Maley in this beautiful book has provided us with a metaphorical map that I found profoundly inspiring and useful. I believe that you will, too. —Parker J. Palmer (author of “On the Brink of Everything,” “Let Your Life Speak,” and “The Courage to Teach”)

This is a beautifully written book that takes you on the author’s journey with her father’s dementia. She begins the journey somewhat reluctantly but becomes stronger and more sure of the path as his disease progresses. As an outdoor adventurer herself she is able to weave her experiences on the trail with his care in such a way that you feel yourself accompanying her every step of the way. I will be the first in line to buy her next book!

I had a similar experience with my father and found this book to be an artistically written and a very comprehensive expression of the difficult journey of dementia. The mix of observations, emotions, surrender and loss are seamlessly woven together to create a fabric of hope and love. The author has paired this family story side by side to the challenges and joys of outdoor/wilderness exploration. A perfect match, because the partnership with our affected loved one feels that uncharted.

I am so grateful that a friend recommended this book to me. I am buying three more to give out to others. I was reading this book as I travelled, and found myself completely swept away by the story line - I lost track of myself and my surroundings in the airport. This is rare praise for nonfiction. I wept through much of the book, but my tears were often in response to the incredible beauty of the book. My mother also struggles with dementia, and I found great solace in the author’s honesty and integrity as she navigated her way through her relationship with her father. I found peace in this book, and I will reread it many times.

Lisa's memoir is a generous, honest, hopeful, and helpful glimpse into navigating the tough terrain of care-giving. It is also a powerful expression of how the craft of care is truly a mutual affair; in which a patient and adaptable approach to meeting the needs of those in our lives who are most vulnerable can (and often does) become the most profound source of personal formation. If you have ever been cared for, have ever cared for anyone, or intend to give or receive care at some future point in your life: Read and ponder this beautiful book!